February 24, 2015

Moved (again)

I moved.

Started over.

If you know me, you should know that I have a blog that was hosted in Blogger. Well, I’ve had several blogs over at Blogger. but that one was special. In that blog, the picture that is clearly visible shows that I wore wings. Literally.

Spread your wings and prepare to fly…

If you know the name of that blog, then you just need to use that blogname (sub domain name) and then point it to WordPress instead of Blogspot.

And there you go!

This blog will still be here though… Until next time.

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February 2, 2015

Emptiness, Exhaustion, and Loneliness

Ever find yourself in the midst of a sea of people, nursing a goblet of Coke spiked with Chivas Regal, while traditional Khmer music blasts through the speakers? Everybody around you is boisterous and alive. Speaking in a mixture of languages, laughing, talking, taking selfies.

It is easy to smile and laugh. Feign enthusiasm at posing for pictures, at the same time making your way down the whisky bottle.

Hours of work put in to look pretty, yet all the makeup in the world cannot quite hide the exhaustion and emptiness your eyes show. The weariness of nights spent crying, tossing and turning, and the restlessness cannot be hidden by tons of foundation. Although sometimes smiles help. It takes a keen eye to spot the forced smile, especially on one who is so adept at smiling through the pain.

Neither music nor dance can help take the emptiness away. Although the presence of friends who care about your puffy eyes every morning helps a lot. Then again, they still cannot quite erase the pain or fill the emptiness fully. A little does help anyway. Thank you, friends.

At the end of the day, you crawl back to bed first before attempting to remove the makeup. Exhaustion is overpowering. Loneliness ensues. And somehow, you begin to feel so lonely that you actually hear crickets in your head.

*Sigh* what a life. What an existence.

image

February 1, 2015

First of Feb

Does the first of February smell like flowers and chocolates to you? Does it smell like love or a rush of pheromones?

This is the month of hearts and as expected, it should be nothing short than the abundance of rainbows, sunshine, and rolling fields of green. Where people picnic and feed each other food as they sit on blankets, sip on wine, and proceed to read poetry.

But really, it is not quite like that, is it?

Sometimes February gives you grief that feels like a million cannons fired at your heart. It feels like an endless pit of despair where all you hear are wails of people agonizing over their day to day lives. Sometimes it feels like you are walking on a desert with no chance of finding an oasis. All you see is one mirage after another.

The promise of salvation and unburden. But it never comes.

Happy Hearts Month.

January 27, 2015

Storytelling

How long has it been since you’ve told a story?

A story does not necessarily mean one has to start with a “Once upon a time” line, but rather the process of sharing an experience. It could be fiction or embellished with flair. It could be fantasized or perhaps totally insane, or inane for that matter. The point of storytelling, for me, is sharing to the world a memory, a snippet, a moment.

Although it is true that not everybody is gifted with words, one simply needs to wait patiently, observe, and somehow there is always something that can be told.

If you wait in a cafe at around 5 in the afternoon, you might catch a group of girls come in and sit at the corner booth. They would sit enjoying their iced frappes, gushing about boys and clothes, or talking about rocket science. Who knows? But if you listen closely, you would realize that this is STORYTELLING.

Shouldn’t you be telling your story today? 💜

January 18, 2015

Challenges 2015

Last year as a tumultuous year for me, plagued with so many aches and pains. Yet this year I define 2015 as “Challenges.”

Challenges are common in life, and I’ve had aplenty. Sometimes, I ask myself if I have had enough. Naturally, the answer is YES! But do I run out of challenges? No. I seem to have been born in a bottomless pit of challenges.

I could say I would like to give up just about now. I feel tired all the way to my bones. I should retire and move to the mountains. Right now, however, I am a hermit in the city. Yep.

As if my challenges are not enough, here I stand – or sit – challenging myself to write more this year. I challenge myself to rekindle my creativity… Thereby attempting to write more, draw more, shoot more.

In my Instagram account, I have my 52 weeks challenge. Maybe I can do something like that again with writing. Like DailyPost…

Right now, the Philippines has a very special visitor, Pope Francis.

To me, he has a face that emanates kindness. Looking at him just makes me want to cry.

Today is also the Sinulog Festival, celebrating Sto. NiƱo.. What a nice day it is.

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September 10, 2014

Rainy Evenings and Frankie S.

Listening to the rhythm of the pouring rain is soothing. This is why I have a thing for RainyMood because it helps me relax.

The weather right now is just a bit relaxing, and I cannot help but put on some Frank Sinatra to bolster my mood.

Dare I say that Frank Sinatra and the rain go hand in hand? Well, not all of his songs. But for songs like Moon River, My Way, and several other ‘moody’ melodies he has, then I think his voice is a perfect fit. His songs lull me to sleep, or at least let me imagine myself immersed in a tub filled with warm soapy water, while lit scented candles surround me.

Luxurious? Relaxing? Surely!

Only in my mind.

In truth, I am sitting, listening to the rain. Temporarily disconnecting my brain from all other thoughts and just let Frank Sinatra take me away.

TTYL

Frank Sinatra is telling me to go fly with him… apparently there is some exotic booze in far Bombay…

September 10, 2014

Revival

Here we go again.

I’m blogging here, and I am also blogging there… and posting pictures everywhere.

A mess, I am. No question about that.

But this blog, this has always been one of those blogs that I could just pour out my heart and soul with ease. Although some posts here are rather mundane, but they used to perk me up whenever the heart felt a little bit down.

These days, I find myself reaching out to writing more. I miss it. I miss having words flow, especially since it has been a challenge to write for the past year.

Sometimes I ache to write on paper. To journal, to write on several notebooks I’ve accumulated. (Yes, I have a habit of collecting notebooks.) But writing using a pen sometimes stops me because of my laziness.

Typing helps my fingers keep up with the pace which my mind runs on.

So lets say I am hoping to blog again.

I’ve said that so many times, I don’t even believe myself.

Hello.

June 22, 2013

A San Antonio Spurs Fan’s Lament

So the 2013 NBA Finals is already done and the Miami Heat are the victors of an epic 7 series match. From the bottom of my heart, I congratulate the Miami Heat for their win, and for doing a spectacular job. The games were not won just by LeBron James alone, but through key players and their coach as well.

~~~

But this is about my San Antonio Spurs. Yes. MY SPURS. I dare call them mine because I’ve been following them around since the 2001-2002 series. During that time something just clicked and I fell in love with the team. I couldn’t memorize the names of the players back then, because the L.A. Lakers were the IT team. But I just could not shake off being drawn to the San Antonio SPURS.

Continue reading

June 14, 2013

Curve Appeal

A colleague of mine caught me looking at this image:

Me: She looks sexy, huh?
Colleague: No. Not sexy.
Me: Well, I think she does look sexy. And I LOVE her suit!
Colleague: No.
Me: Okay.

~~

In Cambodia, being a size 10 is considered fat. Being a size 8 can sometimes be considered fat, too. I am a several sizes over size 10. So I get criticized 100 ways every week for being so thom-thom (fat/large/big).
This is what I deal with every day, and when I get home, I also get the same criticism from my mother.
But I guess I have to live with that.

Perhaps curves are an acquired taste? My husband does not have a problem with this, but almost everybody around me does.

Despite what locals say, and what my mom says, I still think that curves hold a certain appeal. And that women are insanely sexy when they have curves.

All women have curves. Ergo, all women are sexy. IMHO.

:p

June 13, 2013

Well, hello!

It is a good day.

I just got this blog back after a year and a half of being unable to open this blog.

Do you know how awesome this feels?!

I actually moved on and created another blog which will still be used, of course, but I always felt more comfortable with baring my soul in here rather than over there.

My new blog has my new adventures, but my personal thoughts – like the ones ripped from the depths of my heart – have not felt quite comfortable over there. So, you have NO IDEA how elated I feel upon getting access back on this blog.

It feels damn GOOD!

So yes, I do have some more thoughts going about.

I shall be posting them soon.

But this is me, saying hello.

HAI!!!