To be, or NOT to be

I believe that the road to healthiness is sometimes marked by bipolar tendencies. But that’s just me.

Today I went for an early jog because I pledged to myself that I will live a healthy life. Just as I finished warming up, drops of rain started to fall and since our fantastic oval is not domed, I got to enjoy fresh air and rain.

Then I thought, Ah damn it! If I get drenched in the rain, there is a chance I would get sick! … I should go home… nah, it cost me gasoline to get here and I already warmed up! I should just jog.

And jog, I did… more like walk, really.

A quarter of an oval away, the downpour came a little strong so I started jogging… please note that I am NOT in excellent shape.

*huff* *huff* I must get to the starting line! I must.. I must… I must.. *wheezing*

*walking* *wheezing* I can’t do this anymore!!! *wheezing*

Nooooo…! I will jog because this is for my own good!

*jogging* *huff* *huff* Lord, kill me now..!! Pleaaaaaase… *huff* *huff* *wheezing*

*walking* *wheezing* screw this! I’m going home! My legs hurt! *wheezing*

No! No! No! Think positive! You can do this!!!

*jogging* *huff* *huff* Mommy!! This hurts…! $@#$!@# No more! No more! No more! *huff* *huff*

*walking* *wheezing* WHAT ARE YOU? A MAN OR A MOUSE? JOG! NOW! *huff* *huff*

*jogging* *huff* *huff* *huff* This will be the death of meeee… *huff* *huff* *wheezing*

… (you get the idea) a few rounds later ….

*gasping for air* Now that was not so bad.. even with the drizzle… Now the sun is up. And you are alive! Yay me! *gasping for air*

See? Now this back and forth mood makes me believe that when you are trying to be healthy, this attempt to make yourself think POSITIVE is marked by possible bipolar tendencies. I’m not saying you will be bipolar in the end, but don’t you agree?

As for myself, I do believe that it is part of working out because if you do not have a Jillian Michaels to motivate you, you pretty much have to do it yourself. Overall, I think it was good that I did not back down or go home when the rain started, or when I felt like dying. At the end of the day, I guess it is a question of “to be motivated or not to be motivated?” Or something like that.

Anyway, it is a good start. Don’t you agree?

Good job, self!